Are We Really THAT Old? 03/15/25

Has it really come to this? Writing wills??? Some would say, “Oh, it can wait,” while others among us might say, “Are you crazy? You haven’t done it yet? What’re you waiting for?” If you’ve been with us this long you know our two main couples have remained married through the years. But in order to switch it up and more accurately reflect life, we also have a divorced guy who is a serial dater, Craig, as well as a guy the same age as the rest of them, Sam, who married someone many years his junior, Shellie. He met her on a beach so it’s sorta funny her name is Shellie, get it? But they had a kid, Sammy Jr., and now it’s time for them to write a will so Shellie and Sammy will be protected when the day comes that Sam is no longer with us. Or in legalese, when he predeceases her. What is it with legalese? I suppose it’s meant to be precise so you can’t possibly misinterpret it, but for many of us (at least for John and me) it seems indecipherable (see, lawyers aren’t the only ones who can come up with big words). For instance, let’s say you’re babysitting your granddaughter and she wants a third cookie, when her parents told you (and her) that she was only allowed to have two. The kid bargains for a third cookie, and I imagine I might say something like, “C’mon now, we agreed with mommy and daddy that you can have two. Time for bed.” Followed by a major pout. But if the grandkid wanted to become a lawyer, she might respond, “Grandma and Grandpa, since the size of the cookies were not specifically predetermined, you are not rigidly bound by the doctrine of stare decisis to follow that dictum and therefore departure from that decision is justified (kinda like the Supreme Court did with Roe vs Wade). It doesn’t have to be that complicated. *Thank you to a very talented lawyer, dear friend of too many years to count and faithful reader, Roberta Goodman, who helped make sure that sentence made sense.

Onto the second comic, the one where Al bursts out in song “I don’t care what they say, I won’t stay in a world without love.” This actually happened to John, when he worked in advertising, during a client meeting. And like Al, he got no response. But let John tell it:

Back in my Mad Men days (the advertising career, not the show) I was sitting in yet another boring client meeting. Everyone was discussing recent consumer research findings or the relative merits of end-aisle displays versus floor decals or some such nonsense. I wasn't really paying close attention as I was working on a rather unflattering (but painfully accurate) caricature of one of the more annoying clients. Someone in the room said something that started with "They say that..." and then some gibberish followed about market share, then another piled on with "Well, they say..." and then yet another started their sentence with "They say..." I didn't really care to find out who exactly "they" were but the repetition of the phrase struck me as funny and so I said, "I don't care what they say, I won't stay in a world without love." I expected a few chuckles, maybe a suppressed chortle or two. Possibly even an actual laugh. Instead, the response I got was more akin to the audience's response in Mel Brooks' film "The Producers" after viewing the lavish opening number in "Springtime for Hitler." I sheepishly explained myself by saying, "you know... the song." Then I attempted to sing a bar or two. Crickets. Then everyone went back to the research report and I continued finishing the caricature. A short time later I was moved off the account. Fun times.

I instantly loved his story because it also happens to be something I do all the time. And I mean all the time. Usually in my head, thank goodness. When I’m feeling lonely, Neil Diamond comes up, “I am I said, to no one there…” When someone I’m fond of pisses me off, I go to Hamilton, “I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love." I’m watching the Knicks and it’s John Fogerty “Put me in coach, I’m ready to play.” I’m actually singing this, in my head, to the television. And it doesn’t have to even be a situation. It could just be someone introduces me to their friend Eleanor, and right away it’s off to Beatle land, “Eleanor Rigby,” I cannot help it. And now you know. Yeah, “I’m just a little bit crazy.” The question is: did John realize this quirk about me when he thought up this comic? Hell no. As it happens, he was actually talking about himself!

Have a great weekend and we’ll see you next week, but remember, “Every time you go away from me (us), you take a piece of me (us) with you…”

Andy and John