We wrote you a newsletter explaining why not all our comics would depict situations in and around the coronavirus. So what did we do? Almost all coronavirus. Finally last week we had two couples go to a restaurant. Remember those days? But you’ve got to admit, the news and concern about the aforementioned virus is pretty much all-consuming. However, The New 60 is all about what it’s like to be of a certain age in the here and now. Take the first comic in your scroll this week. It concerns a guy in a supermarket, trying to decide whether to go on the much shorter self-checkout lane or go to a traditional lane with a cashier. That’s a subject that works both ways. Both before and after corona, our motivation is the same. To get into and out of the store as fast as possible. But now in the age of Corona, we want to get out even quicker. And so we brave the self-checkout lane, but hey, it’s not as easy as it looks. And fine, we’re good with how to position the bar codes when every purchase gives off that satisfying “beep” but what about produce? They don’t have bar codes. And how about if you brought your own bags, place them on the converyor belt and then it starts moving away from you? Not that this would ever happen to either one of us, but it happens, trust us. And how honest are you going to be when you bought organic cucumbers but when the price chart comes up on the screen, you see regular cucumbers are cheaper? Huh? And then, no matter how smart you are and no matter how technically proficient you are, something goes wrong. Always. You hit debit when you meant credit, you forgot to enter your coupon number for a particular item, and you don’t know how to make the screen go backwards, you get the drift. That’s why they always have those people stationed nearby. So that when everybody yells “Help!!!!” they can come over and fix your problem. Except that almost everyone in line is yelling help and the final result is you get stuck in the supermarket longer than if you had just gone over to the traditional checkout line in the first place. Ugh. But if you do go traditional, promise us you won’t be one of those people who take 12 items to the 10 items or less express lane. Andy is counting and he does not like getting stuck behind those guys.

The next comic is about dealing with the novel coronavirus and all the new rules. We don’t care who you are, but if you are housebound for a considerable length of time, you go stir crazy. You’ve got to get out and do something, even if it’s exercise. If you are like either of us, you are desparate to change your routine of the last three weeks, even if just a little bit. So if you usually go walking in the woods with your mask and gloves, chances are you want to walk somewhere else with your mask and gloves. That is why we took you to the high school track. Lots lanes on the track and long benches on the sidelines so it’s relatively easy to maintain social distance (and shouldn’t it be called physical distance anyway)? Social is defined as “…needing companionship and therefore best suited to living in communities,” and distant is well, distant. So social distance is an oxymoron if we’ve ever seen one. Anyway we had fun on the track with the fact that once we get tired of our new activity, then what? Do you want to go back home and shelter in place some more? We didn’t think so.

In closing this week, please have some patience with your cartooning buddies. It’s a little tougher coming up with new stuff when you can’t do 95% of the stuff you used to do. However fear not, we will slather ourselves in hand sanitizer and press ahead. See you next week with two new ones. If there is a next week.

Peace, love and social distance

Andy and John

If you’ve come to the New 60 blog for advice on how to handle the corona virus, you are just as clueless as we are. And while we don’t know exactly how to handle our isolation and social distance, at least we can make fun of it. Apologies in advance if anyone or their loved ones are suffering from this horribly scary virus. We would never make light of suffering. We are just poking fun at how we’ve had to change our lives.

And just as Corona has changed everything we do in real life, it also has an affect on our comics. This week we heard from two of our loyal fans, Bill and Diane Mech, who pointed out that the guys should not be meeting in the diner since just about every restaurant in America (and most of the world) is closed. In fact Bill suggested we put them in separate booths, which we did. And then we went a step further into the land of the absurd and had them break in, of course. Thanks Bill and Diane.

In coming up with two new comics per week, we try to stay more than a month ahead of when we publish, so we have a stockpile of finished work. Well, when you get ahead you run the risk of being out of touch with what is happening here and now. We will be sure to serve up some off kilter takes on our changing reality but also, we will just do plain old life. A) because we’re optimistic the world will eventually return to “normal” and B) because we already thought up all these cool ideas and we’re too stubborn to scrap them.

Now the second idea you’ll see is based on another result of living with the threat of Corona. If you’re into sports like John, you’ll notice this. If you’re really, really into sports like Andy, you are suffering without anything to watch at night. In fact, one of Andy’s favorite activities is to watch a game while texting with his son or to actually watch with him. They get passionate about the games, the strategy and the moves and they debate what moves their teams should make. What do you do when you no longer have any games to watch? You can’t yell and debate over a replay of a game from last year (yes, Andy has lowered himself to watching the occasional Mets and Knicks 2019 reruns) when he already knows the result. One night when on the phone with his brother-in-law Buzzy, he heard about people so desparate, they were watching chess. Bingo! A comic was born. John and Andy imagined the same passion for baseball strategy being applied to a chess match. And chess, by the way, is considered a sport. Really. C’mon. I mean it’s easier to imagine an NBA player being good at chess than it is to imagine a chess player being good at hoops, but we digress.

At any rate, we want to thank you from 6 feet away for continuing to follow us. As we see it, everyone can use a little laugh, especially in these troubling times.

See you (digitally) next week,

Andy and John

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