I'll Take Everything, Except That. 11/06/26

No one wants to read a strip about 4 white married couples. So we featured a Black married couple (yes Black, despite the last name of Mandelbaum) and gasp, a single guy. You gotta have a single guy. It’s hard to go on embarrassing dates with someone you’ve been married to for 40+ years. Say you’re out to dinner with your spouse of long standing. If you fart a little too loudly or spill spaghetti sauce on your shirt, it’s not a biggie. But if you do it on a first date, well that’s something else entirely. So we created Craig. A fairly recent divorcee with (both John and I hate him for this…) a full head of hair. So what exactly goes through a guy’s head on a first date, even if he’s in his 60s? We expect all our male readers already know this, but as a service to our female readers, we’ll give you a glimpse.

The first thing is, do you want to have sex with this person? Sorry but men remain animals, though I expect newly single women feel similarly. It’s sorta like “Well he or she is really funny…but.” Or the opposite, “he or she is really boring, but…”Actually a friend told me of a recent widow who told this new fella, “I just want someone to go to movies and theater and restaurants and parties with, but no sex.” And supposedly she tells this to her friends, as in “I told him I’d go out with him but no hanky panky. Ever.” And then, here’s where men’s thinking really differs. We love a woman who doesn’t ask for her salad dressing on the side, who eats hearty stuff like burgers and fries and wings, just as long as she doesn't have a belly that hangs over her waistline. It’s okay that our collective bellies hang over our collective waistlines, but not hers.

So when Craig sees his date order an everything burger with the works, he’s excited. That is until she asks for all the fixings to be left off. In effect she’s turned her everything burger into a nothing burger. But all is forgiven (of course) when she invites him over to her place. That’s it. Not more complicated than that. And now that we have revealed the inner workings of the male mind, we’d love to hear our women readers reveal what goes on in their minds. You can reply to this blog or to Andy@thenew60comic.com or John@the new60comic.com. We will reprint our favorite responses and of course, keep your identity anonymous, unless you want them known.

So th-th-that’s all folks for this week. It’s time for me to make lunch. A tuna salad sandwich on rye, hold the bread. But please don’t reveal to anyone that I took the bread off. It’s bad for my image. Have a great weekend,

Andy and John