Boiling is the Kindest Way to Kill a Lobster. Wanna bet? 10/30/26

What is the kindest way to kill a lobster? Before we go any further I must confess that I don’t particularly like lobster. I can hear a collective “What????” out there, but before you judge, let me explain. When I was about 10 my mom took me and a camp friend to the Sea Spray Inn in East Hampton for an overnight trip. We had lobster for dinner and I threw my guts up. You know when you’re 10 you get deeply embarrassed about something like that. 63 years later, I still haven’t gotten over it. Fast forward to this past summer, when my daughter Ali and son-in-law Mark invited us over for a clambake. I wasn’t aware that a clambake included lobster, But when I found out, I just asked Mark to please leave the lobster out of my portion. I was fascinated to see the cooking process. It’s important to know that he is a very kind, compassionate soul. So when I watched him raise the meat cleaver and cut the lobster’s head off, I said, “What the f***?” And he replied, “Actually that’s the most humane way to kill them. Much kinder than slowly boiling them to death.” Hmm. He had a point but I still don’t like lobster. I recounted this to John and it led to our first comic.

Our other comic deals with the massively addictive world of sports betting. In fact it has become the fastest growing addiction among young men in the country. Which means ruinous gambling addiction is growing faster than heroin or crystal meth. Some of the ubiquitous promo ads promise can’t miss bets like this, “Wage one dollar that more than one point will be scored in tonight's basketball game and win $100 in betting money.” You have to win, and once you start gambling your free $100, you’re hooked. As John pointed out, it’s amazing that Major League Baseball once banned Pete Rose from baseball, and denied him entrance to the Hall of Fame, while next year the former Oakland A’s are moving to Las Vegas. Hypocritical yes? But also funny. At least a little.

That’s it for this week, I have to log off and place some money on tonight’s Thursday Night Football with my FanDuel app. Just kidding. I promise. You can bet on it.

Andy and John