Clogged Drains and Award Shows 1/31/2020

“Honey, come on in, the Grammys are starting.” That’s a sentence NOT being uttered in many houses where the participants are 60+. Some houses, maybe, but not many. “Oh, look who’s hosting. It’s that, ya know, the one who was a classically trained pianist and uhh, name is like a piano, uhh, Keyes, that’s it Alicia Keyes!” And that’s just the opening. The rest of the night is a series of questions like our kids used to ask when they were 5 years old. “Who’s that? What does she sing? How does it go? Why is her hair black on the bottom and green on the top? Why does that man have a motorized hat with a curtain?”

It’s been said that the only two types of programs people watch live anymore are awards shows and sports. This is because most people want to know who won in real time, before they get alerts on their watches, cell phones and iPads. Not recognizing anyone on the Grammys, Andy took refuge by switching to the Knicks game. Then - realizing he was watching the Knicks (no comment) - he quickly switched back to the Grammys. As John pointed out, “The only people I recognized on the Grammys were the ones who died last year.” And boom, we had a comic.

The next one was easy because it really happened to Andy. Only it was a clogged toilet instead of a sink. John “I’m the prude in this crowd” Colquhoun said, “A clogged toilet is gross. Let’s do a sink.” You have to admit, the guy had a point. So we did a sink. And for the ending, well, that was the easy part, what goes with balsamic vinegar? Well, a caprese salad. And there was our second comic. By the way, we now are well stocked in plain, old fashioned white vinegar. And if it ever happens again (which it did), we found a trick that actually works. Fill a bucket up with hot (but not boiling hot) water and dump in in the toilet from about waist high. It makes a big splash, but the force of the water dislodges…whatever was lodged. You get the idea. And, to tie back to the beginning (Grammy Awards) If you don’t know, now you know. Courtesy Biggie Smalls.

Have a great, clog-free weekend.

Andy and John